If Laura, Suzanne, Debra and
Rose go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Suzanne, Debra
and Rose.
If Mike, Charlie,
Bob and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as
Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.
When the bill arrives, Mike,
Charlie, Bob and John will each throw in $20, even
though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything
smaller, and none will actually admit they want change back.
When the girls get their bill,
out come the pocket calculators.
Money
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a
$2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.
Bathrooms
A man has six items in his
bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a
bar of soap, and a towel from the Holiday Inn.
The average number of items
in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A
man would not be able to identify most of these items.
Cats
Women love cats.
Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick
cats.
Marriage
A woman marries a man expecting
he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she
does.
Dressing
Up
A woman will dress up to go
shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer
the phone, read a book, and get the mail.
Men don't dress up unless they absolutely have to.
Offspring
A woman knows all about her
children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends,
favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of
some short people living in the house.
