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You
Know You Are
Addicted to
Coffee If...
You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.
You
sleep with your eyes open.
You've worn out your third
pair of shoes this week.
Your
eyes stay open when you sneeze.
You
chew other people's fingernails.
You
can type sixty words
per minute with your feet.
You
can jump start your car without cables.
You
don't sweat... you percolate.
Instant coffee takes too long to make.
You
channel surf faster without the remote.
You
have a picture of your
coffee mug on your coffee mug.
You
short out motion detectors.
You
soak your dentures in coffee overnight.
You answer the door before people knock.
You walk twenty miles on your treadmill
before you realize it's not plugged in.
You've built a miniature city
out of little plastic stirrers.
You get a speeding ticket
even when you are parked.
The only time you are standing
still is during an earthquake.
Pass This On To All Your Friends!
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